>Day 6: Open defenselessness

>Let go of whatever you use to protect yourself (Psalm 27). There is nothing to fear, for the Lord himself will watch over you. A chalicer being poor in spirit knows that all that happens is from the Lord. As such chalicers should constantly meditate on the story of Nehemiah, and memorize his prayer (1.5-11).

Are you sure?

The acid which refines lead is questions. I must question, and question the question. But I must do this without doubt. Do I know how to question without doubting? Questions propel me into the present moment. Do I think I know the answer? Do I know what you are going to say? Do I know what you are thinking? Do I know anything? I know nothing. I know nothing because I do not have the facts. If I have the facts I do not have the key to unscramble them. The messages from the present which are broadcast to the all corners are encrypted. I must not only learn how to capture the messages but then I must also decrypt them. Do I have the key? So I ask myself, just as the event is hitting me, am I sure that I am seeing what I think I am seeing? Am I hearing what I think I am hearing?

I must ask the voice which answers the moment, the voice which raises up a shield against the moment with its interpretations, I must ask the voice, “Are you sure?” This is a way to sneak around my shields and take a peek. The voice will say ‘yes, yes, I am sure. Those noises are horrendous ogres wanting to destroy me. Do not go out there.” But it turns out that the beating on the shields was You, knocking wanting to come in and have a meal together.

Once upon a time there were ogres. They are still around. Shields, good shields are important. Weapons too. Do not discard weapons or shields needlessly. But I must understand when to raise shields, when to fire weapons, and when to put them down. I must ask myself – Are you sure?

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About spaceloom

An urban monk, and an experienced spiritual director with a Masters in Psychology. Married with two children. Want to know me better? Read my thoughts.
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